Deep questions to ask in a work/professional situation

This may seem a little off subject from my normal posts, but I think relationships are ESSENTIAL to our growth and expansion. While surface level conversations are fine, I always feel like I get the most benefit out of a conversation where I really get to know the truth of who a person is. I often find that the more open and vulnerable I am willing to be, the more that is reciprocated. I try to be as open as I can with my clients about anything I am struggling with, what got me through tough times, and anything else I might be dealing with. I often find that the relationships that are built because of this mutual openness are some of the most fulfilling and supportive relationships I have. I end up learning just as much (or more!) from them as they do from me!

Where this can get tricky are situations that are assumed to be more professional upfront. I do think it is possible to get to know a person on a deeper level in ANY situation but I find that in certain settings, it's important to be more tactful about what we're asking and how.

A good starting point is to ask questions about life outside of work to find some common ground or interests to build upon. Here are some ideas for questions to ask to facilitate getting to know someone in a professional setting:

1. What is the most impactful lesson you have learned in your career thus far?

2. What is your favorite part of what you get to do (and why)?

3. What has been the most trying time in your career and what did you do to get through it?

4. What is the most important people skill or relationship building skill that you value most in the people you deal with in your work?

5. What do you think my biggest strengths are?

6. What do you think my biggest weaknesses are?

7. What are some of your biggest goals? What is your next step?

8. What brings the most fulfillment to your life?

And of course these questions can be modified to facilitate relationship building or deepening in non-professional settings as well. I'd love to hear ideas for further thoughts or probing questions!

Stress, worry, dreams, and sleep

I get a lot of incredibly sweet comments and messages about how positive I am and my outlook on life, and while I absolutely appreciate those messages and do my best to see the brighter side of life and the best in other people, I also intend to be fully real with you guys when life gets tough in the hopes that if you can relate to this, that you don't feel alone and that you perhaps you may also be able to find comfort in what helps me.

Let me start by saying that I can be very laid back and light about most things, but I can also be very high-strung/high anxiety about other things. I can immediately tell when I'm stressed/anxious/down about anything that that starts coming out in 2 ways: 1. I worry more about things that don't normally bother me (finances, for example) and have a more lack-focused mentality than I normally do; and 2. my sleep is either very restless or I start having crazy, stressful nightmares or incredibly emotionally-draining dreams. The past week or so, my dreams have been absolutely insane to the point that I wonder how my brain even conjured up such horrible dreams/thoughts. Or like last night, I spent the whole night dreaming about horrible emotional situations to the point where I've had to spend a good chunk of my morning so far processing and dealing with the residual stress of it.

So for the first issue (lack mentality, other surface fears), my strategy is to go into what's bothering me (it also helps to remember that these fears and worries aren't REAL, it's just stress making itself heard in whatever way it can). If I just push it away, it keeps nagging me with either lack-based thoughts or just a chronic low-level anxiety and icky feeling. I need to sit down and journal to get to the root of what's bothering me. I KNOW we are busy people, but TRUST ME, it is worth the 5 minute time investment to deal with the problem so that you can move on with your day in a much more effective way (not to mention that YOU and your emotional health are WORTH IT)!! I created this method I call a "fear-crusher list" a long time ago for my beachbody customers and coaches. It's a technique that I use for everything and helps me a TON:

As for dreams and emotional stress, this excerpt from Teal Swan's, "The Sculptor in the Sky" ALWAYS makes me feel better. I've re-read it a couple times this morning already :)

So no matter what you are going through, whether that be big emotional tough stuff or just the day-to-day stress of life, remember that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Sending you all HUGE HUGS today!!

Love, Katelyn